Why hide it?
by CrazyChristianCowgirl
Summary: After Twilight of the Apprentice. Kanan sees the change in every member of his crew, even if he cannot see it with his eyes; he knows and he is determined to change it, to fix it. A One-shot. For you angst lovers, this is for you. Rated T to be safe, no cursing or anything suggested. Reviews are awesome. Thanks!


**I do not even want to think about how long it has been since you have heard from me. MONTHS! I'm angry at myself and I'm not even the one waiting on a blasted story! I'm so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so sorry!**

 **Next topic, since I've had so much writers block with this story, and have been Star Wars obsessed lately; this is a one-shot on STAR WARS REBELS, trying to get my creative juices flowing.**

 **Now, I'm not dead! So, yay! I survived my summer, of odd jobs, my birthday, crazy friends, a boyfriend who dumped me (I think I'm going to follow my dad's advice and get another boyfriend at twenty-five, listen your old man, he's smart.) and several, several, SEVERAL, incidents. My brother was in the hospital, my parents both work full-time. Not even funny y'all, this has been a summer that went by way too fast, and (being homeschooled) I started school two weeks early. I had camps, and then more camps, and then other camps. All in all, the entire month of July was, well, camp. So I actually have excuses for my incompetence. I'm sorry.**

 **Next topic; the story. I worked on this right after I bought the latest season of Star Wars Rebels, (I don't have cable) and it's short, and kind of sad, but I like it.  
Also, this season was the best yet, if you ask me. Amazing. The plot, the characters, the angst! Oh, every fangirl's dream. And Ahsokah! I'm so so so upset, I literally almost cried. Killed by her master, *Cries*. Oh, so sad, I think they shouldn't have this on Disney. I'm a teenager, and I was gaping wide-mouthed at the TV for a good hour. **

**Anyways, It's like 1:30 in the morning here, and I've been up since four A.M. Hope you guys enjoy this!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own anything by Lucasfilm or Disney. Star wars and Star Wars Rebels is an amazing work of art that is not crafted by me or anyone I know (sadly). The characters belong solely to their creator and shall remain that way.**

Kanan Jarrus sat on his bunk, and sighed, touched the linen that wrapped his eyes. Ran his fingers over the lightsaber that laid in his hands, forever the symbol of what took away his eyes.  
He could hear the laughter of his padawan, that seemed too far away, for the kid, no, the Jedi, had not laughed in too long. They pretended like they weren't, but Kanan knew. Zeb would take loads; Ezra would lead missions.  
He could not see, but he knew Sabine trained like one was fighting for her life, and Hera cried late at night when she thought everyone else was asleep.

Kanan could feel the threatening dark waves that rolled out of his padawan's room, and sobbing that overtook the young man. And sometimes, Kanan wished he could shed those tears as well, let them roll down his cheeks, salt the skin of his weathered face; but he could not. And so he suffered in silence, broken, shattered silence. They all pretending nothing was wrong, covering up the inner sadness that covered them so well, so thoroughly. They all knew it was there, they all wished is wasn't.

He could now hear the soft sobs from the room beside his, the tears of his love, the ones she thought no one knew about, the ones she would pass off as just his imagination. The heartbroken underlying crack in her voice, after a night awake crying, that she tried to hide.

Why did they all try to hide it? Why hide it?

Kanan knew that his padawan was having nightmares again, as his agony rolled through the Force. Dreams of horrors that the most imaginative person could not describe. And those hot, salty tears were running down his scarred cheeks, that he tried to hide.

Why did they all try to hide it? Why hide it?

Kanan knew that Sabine sat in the corner of her room, fingering a worn picture of their family before everything happened, everything changed. Because she missed the only true family she had ever had, the one that didn't try to hide.

Why did they all try to hide it? Why hide it?

Kanan knew that Zeb sat on his bunk, his bow rifle by his bed, his fingers brushing it, listening to the soft sobs of the teen that slept above him. And the brokenness he felt in his heart, the brokenness that kept him awake, so he knew that if anything happened, he would never fail to protect his family. He tried to hide his tender heart, but Kanan saw, even through his blind eyes. He tried to hide.

Why did they all try to hide it? Why hide it?

Why hide all the brokenness, the heartbreak, the crying, the nightmares. The misery.  
Why hide it? To keep them all from shattering. From breaking apart so terribly, that no one could repair; And that they would be too broken to live to see the next morning day.

Kanan could not stand it anymore, he ignited the saber, felt the heat from the blade. And promised, he would no longer hide these broken pieces; they were all broken, but the fragments make the detailed mosaic. Kanan would be what his crew needed; he would be a blind Jedi. He would be Kanan Jarrus, Jedi Knight.

 **Please review, they make my day!**


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